No matter where you go or what you do, you live your entire life within the confines of your head.

Best Website Award

Best Website Award

I am sure you will all have seen the advertisements, but it is now official, is now the best website in the world following a recent survey of internet users*, and I am just so dam proud.  My site is the winner of the following awards, most interesting website, most fun website, best jokes website, most honest website, best family website, best Arsenal website, best cooking website and best overall website. scored a perfect 100% score in each and every section and was described by everyone of those surveyed as perfect in each and every way.

Okay, so now enough of all this nonsense. However there is a point to this page and this article, so please read on. Last night as I was watching TV I noticed something on an advertisement for some cosmetic, they had just been awarded the best make-up of its kind award by the readers of some magazine. Well done them! But then in very small print, and only for a split second, a notice appeared on screen of just how many had answered the question put by the magazine. 329 readers surveyed, and 89% recommended the make-up.  Hold up, surely that is something close to a con, at best it is misleading. If the magazine sells 50,000 copies a month, and is read by only 2 people per copy, it then means that about 300 of 100,000 recommended the product, and surely that is not a award winner number.

I then started to take notice of the other ads, and over and over again these little messages appeared on all the ads of this kind. Do these companies really believe that consumers, and I guess female consumers in the main, are really that gullible, really that naive? What is worrying for me is that the obvious answer must be yes, because if not, then they would not do it. These companies, who spend millions on their ads, and spend millions researching their marketing tactics, must believe that the consumer will not take any notice of the numbers and the small print, and will just take it as stated and believe that their product is in fact the best and so should buy it.

So of course that got me thinking and so hence this page for my now award winning website. But of course that does also mean that I believe you, the reader of my website, is gullible and naive enough to actually believe that this is now the best website in the world because my survey said so. The fun you could have with this is endless. But in this age, where the shopper is surely King (or Queen) right now, should these companies not be treating their targeted consumers with a tad more respect, should they not realise that consumers have so much more choice and so advertise to us in a more honest way. But here again I guess the answer is no, why should they, they will do what they have to do, they will do what works for them. It is in fact us, the consumer, who is really at fault here.

The same principle applies to all those sales that we see everywhere. “Up to 75% off” is just one advertisement message that appeared in my papers this weekend. Well if it is such a bargain then I must rush out now and buy it, even if I don’t need the product. Why is it that we are still spending so much money if everything is 20% off, it is because we are buying stuff we don’t really need, and that is exactly what got us in the mess in the first place. Stop it. Over the weekend, on the radio, I heard a woman talking about the “costs of the sales”, her point was that all these bargains were actually costing us more than the savings we could make. We as consumers, actually travel further to get a deal and the costs involved outweighed the savings. Stop it.

Finally the other point I must make on this rant of mine is the message from our glorious government, Spend, Spend, Spend, we the leaders of this land have taken copious steps to encourage you, the people, to continue spending money you don’t have on stuff you don’t need. We have reduced VAT, by all of 2.5%, to encourage you to spend more of the money you don’t have, we have lowered your mortgages so you must spend more on stuff you really do not need. We the masters of the universe are just so dam clever, so Spend, Spend, Spend, and be dammed.

Oh my, it is such a crazy old world we live in, so crazy in fact that maybe the awards for as being the worlds best website, with the worlds best Joke section, cooking section, Life section, Political comment and every other area of the site is not so crazy after all. Maybe they are a reflection that it is I who was behind the time, behind the marketing logic and behind the tactics of government all the time and so I now gladly accept all my awards and am really proud of them.

*Please note this survey was of 10 of my bestest friends who were paid a large sum of money so that their views were influenced. Equally they were the smallest and weakest group I would put together so that I could also physically intimidate them as well.

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© 2008 Paul Kavanagh. All rights reserved.